Do you want your wife back before the divorce is final? Does she ignore your pleas for reconciliation? Does she seem like she is completely over your marriage and that she has no wish to ever come back to you?
If you have found yourself in this situation, it probably feels too complicated. It seems like nothing you do to get your wife back works. You want your wife back before the divorce is final, but it seems like more and more time is passing and you are no where close to getting her back.
When the clock is ticking, it makes you feel desperate. In fact, you might have resorted to begging and pleading to get your wife back. But if anything, this only made the situation worse, right?
The problem with trying to rush the reconciliation is that it puts all of the power into your wife’s hands. You’ve told her that you’re willing to change. You’ve told her you don’t want a divorce. You’ve even told her if she’ll just come back you’ll do anything necessary to make your marriage better. But telling her these things only seem to make her want to listen to you less and less. You can’t even have a serious discussion about your relationship anymore because she just tells you she will get the divorce whether you want it or not.
If you have found yourself in this situation, the best thing you can do is stop pleading with your wife to come back. It is a little bit of reverse psychology at play here, but if you take the power away from your wife, not only will you feel better, but it will actually make her notice you more. You actually have a choice here, even though she is trying to tell you that you don’t. You can choose whether or not you beg her to come back. You can choose whether or not your reconciliation is on your terms and not just hers. And you can choose, in the end, whether or not you really want to get your wife back.
Taking things slowly right now will give you a chance to think. One of the most effective techniques you can use to get your wife back is the No Contact Rule. This means no contact with your wife for a week or two. Even if she calls you, you don’t call her back (unless you have children, of course). If you do talk to her, it is not about reconciling or saving your marriage. Be as nonchalant as possible. Keep everything on your terms and drama-free.